Have you ever noticed how little insignificant and unimportant issues can become a real problem in a marriage? So many couples fall out over something quite minor, and then something else, and then something else until all the small little issues become one quite big marriage problem.
If the first minor issue had been resolved as and when it occurred then it would be all forgotten by the time the next inevitable marriage problem arose.
It is easy to see the wood for the trees when you are faced with only one or even two problems in your marriage, but when all the little problems are left unresolved and the issues begin to mount you start to see a compound effect with a large number of marriage problems all piled on top of each other which are more difficult to unravel.
Take loans for example; if you take out a simple loan that is quite manageable in size and meet the monthly repayments on time then all is ok. If you find one month that you are unable to meet the repayment, as long as you sort yourself out quite quickly and meet the repayment the following month the little blip shouldn't make much of a difference. If however you fail to meet your repayments the next month, and the next month a problem starts to occur and all too soon you get to the stage where your finances are totally out of control.
This compound effect is very similar to marriage problems, leave one and you may be alright. Leave another and it still might not have an affect, but leave marriage problem, after marriage problem unresolved and you will start to find that they totally swamp your marriage.
If you have found that all the little issues in your marriage have compounded leaving you with one big marriage problem then the first step you need to take is to identify the individual issues. Sit down and make a list, then once you understand what is actually causing your marriage problems decide which issues are important.
Don't let trivia get in the way just because your partner might leave their dirty underwear lying around it doesn't mean that it's the end of your marriage and it's probably a trait that was there long before you married. Identify the real marriage problems: things that truly matter. Don't just make a long, long list to just throw at your partner's door.
Once you have unraveled the compounded issues and identified the true route cause of your marriage problems you will have the taken the first and the greatest step towards saving your marriage.